Thursday, January 13, 2011

the ultimate humiliation

let's start at the end.

From 2010 First Snow Day

now back to the beginning. see, it was the first snowy day here in chicago. and my mom thought that meant it was time to pull out this cutesy little sweater and matching boots.


From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day


i think you can tell from these photos that she broke my spirit by forcing me to wear that ridiculous get-up.

From 2010 First Snow Day


so then when we came home, i had to rub every single memory of the humiliation out of my body.


From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

apparently there's this thing called static that i didn't know about, however. it was so strong that it made my ears float.

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

From 2010 First Snow Day

how could you do this to me, mom? and dad, you just sat there, laughing.

i'll never forgive you.

From 2010 First Snow Day

here's a slideshow of the whole scarring episode. i'll never be the same.

BEWARE

for it is i, the....

...WINTER DEMON! MWAHAHAHAHAAAAA.


...not buying it? rats.

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KEES MEEE

oh, i see you have a beard. you'll notice i do to. there's really only one thing to do from here...

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oh, don't mind me, i'm just having A MONSTER CHEW




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some options for next year's holiday card

here's for the secular friends:



and then this one for the christmas-freaks.


or maybe this one. i was going for an "oh santa, i'm so nervous you're not going to give me the bully stick i asked for!" look.


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sleeping in my father's lap

i was feeling a little overwhelmed by all of the holiday festivities swirling around me, so i needed to find a safe space, one where nobody could get to me.




and then i refused to move for two hours. let's hope dad never learns that it's okay to move when i'm sleeping.
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post-holiday time

here's me, after christmas dinner. i was very good. i didn't overeat (in fact, i refused to eat for two days straight) and i definitely didn't drink too much.


i wish i could say the same for my uncle obi.


we shouldn't judge him. that never-ending bowl of water plus secret under-the-table turkey from poppa really did him in.

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this is my fiance, lucy

we're in love.




you know how i know we're in love?


because i piddled on her couch and she didn't even care. in fact, i think she kind of respected me for it.
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do you like this rug?

me too. i like to sit on different shapes and see how it makes me feel.

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bow chicka bow bow

oh, hey there baby. come on in. sit down. make yourself...cooohhhhmmmmfortable.

tha's right. now lay that fiiiiine body down. right there, like that. ohhh yeah, baby, this is gonna be so great.



alright now honey, that's right, now turn on over...that's right. BECAUSE I'M GOING TO TICKLE THE CRAP OUT OF YOUR TUMMY!!!
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my uncle obi

he let me snuggle with him while we were watching how to train your dragon. i really love him.


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